Friday 13 September 2013

Road to recovery

Exactly seven months since my last posting!  Some may think that I'm gone already because of the long silence eh :-)  Alhamdulillah, I'm well and fine.

The CT Scan done on Feb 8, 2013 showed "a huge lobulated heterogenous fungating mass...measuring 8.4 x 10.3 x 12.1 cm".  Boy that was really big! Sternum was also affected with "lobulated soft tissue mass...measuring 3.8 x 7.4 x 8.9 cm.  Lung was also affected, of which the largest lobe measuring 8 mm.  And what does that mean?  I was at stage 4 already.   The Onco has warned me that at this stage chances of fully cured is very slim and they could only offer palliative care - relieving and preventing the suffering of patient.  She also queried on my feeling at that time and guess what I said - "well, kalau ajal dah sampai, sakit ni adalah sebagai penyebabnya saja... ".  When I told my friend about this, she asked whether I cried when receiving the news.  Nope, I did not cry coz' I really believe that for every sickness that God gave us, there is also a cure for it, we will have to find which one is suitable.

I started my chemo on March 4, 2013, 6 cycles of Docetaxel.  Infusion was done on day care, I went in the morning, have it infused and go back afterwards.  The after-effect is surprisingly quite mild compared to the one I experienced in the UK.  But few days after my first infusion, I had a fever which required me to go to the hospital to check on my blood.  Definitely the platelet was low but I did not get  to be admitted after I promised that I will do so if I felt really bad.  Hair started to fall, but no problem with me coz' I have experienced being bald before.  This time round, it did not make me totally bald;  the baby hair remained strong.  I did not experience nausea and vomiting, but my tastebud was a bit different.  Nonetheless, I ate what I can so that I won't feel very weak.

The mild effect compared to the one held in the UK was I guess because of the supplements that I take during my recovery time.  I had my Sarimah Sari agegard a sachet a day,  vita lea multivitamins & Nutriferon and some other Shaklee products like vitamin C and so on.  The 6 cycles went smooth; second dose on Mar 25, third dose on April 15, forth dose on May 8, fifth dose on May 29, and the last dose on June 19, 2013.  Few days before those dates, I had to go to the hospital for blood check up, if my platelet was ok, I'm ok to receive the next dose and they also prescribed me the anti-histamine pills whereby I had to swallow 16 pills 3 times a day!  Boy that was tough.

I had another CT Scan on July 2, 2013 to see the effectiveness of the chemo.  Alhamdulillah, the huge mass has shrunk to 5 cm, the other affected area has also shrunk.  I would have expected it as I don't feel any pain on my chest anymore.  During my bad times, the chest area hurt really bad that I couldn't get a peaceful sleep.  Turning side to side was really painful.  Laughing out loud was painful too; when someone cracked a joke, I had to leave so as not to feel the pain.  And what a sad feeling was, when I read the Qur'an, I cannot even finish up one complete line.  Walking upstairs to my bedroom was a challenge to - I easily felt tired and out of breath.

But now, all the pain have gone, back pain is also gone too.  It's typical of a breast cancer patient to experience back pain, the reason being, the nerve at the breast is the same with the nerve at the back.  At one time I even went to see the malay tukang urut to see if there is anything wrong with my bone.  The diagnosis was - urat tersepit bawah tulang belikat :-)  With no back pain, I can perform my daily prayer at ease.  I was infact able to perform 20 rakaat of tarawih prayer at the mosque during Ramadhan.

Credit for the recovery also goes to the B17 injection that I took prior to the chemo.  I had it in January before the chemo started and day by day I saw the improvement.  If before, going in and out of the car is a painful experience, day after day, the pain went away.

I'm actually due for surgery but I have been delaying it hoping that it will continue to shrink.  I don't mind lumpectomy; mastectomy is really scary eh!  I'm aware of the after-effect of the mastectomy.  During my chemo I came across a lady who's whole hand/arm was bloated due to water retention.  During my recent visit at the hospital, I bumped into her and she has gone thinner than before but the bloated arm was still visible.  On another experience, a lady showed me her scar and she said the cancer grew back on the same spot.  Wah, that's scary!

All in all, as long as I have a quality life that I'm having now, being able to take care of family, drive my kid to school, pray at ease, go anywhere I like, is already a blessing.  Opps, I infact perform my walking exercise at the park everyday now to control my blood pressure.  So far so good,  around 1,500 steps a day (800 - 1000 meter) at ease, is good enough for a cancer patient eh :-)

In conclusion, cancer is a chronic metabolic disease, we just have to take care of what we eat.  If so happen that you have one, no worries, a lot of people got cured by taking care of what they eat.  Do the DAON - detox, alkalize, oxigenate, and nutrient, InshaaAllah we will be fine.  Life is a gamble, sometimes we win, sometimes we lose.  If we take care of what we eat, we will be healthy and will win over the cancer.  If we don't, we will lose.  And not forgetting, DOA too...moga Allah SWT memberikan kesihatan yang baik dan umur yang panjang lagi berkat untuk kita semua, Amiinnn...